I am thankful for the things I am thankful for and that's why I should be thankful.

I'm thankful my mother didn't notice me crying in the car on the way home.
I'm thankful that dearest boyfriend isn't silly enough to join the military and make me hurt. Or more like I'm lucky, and that I'm thankful that I'm lucky.

I'm thankful that I have a healthy fear about doing things like drugs and going to strange countries with HIV tainted blood supplies.

I am thankful that I graduated high school.

I'm a little bit thankful that no one really reads this blog yet. I don't have to explain my own words to people. To justify myself to outsiders who are actively trying to misunderstand. That, at this point, in this place, I can just be. I can just write. I can't write like that when I know people are reading. I turn too passive-aggressive or else I censor myself too much. I'm too sensitive.

I'm thankful for life. For this oxygen. For this carbon and for the sulfur that makes my DNA, however storied are the problems that lie therein, because otherwise I wouldn't be me, now would I?